Three Stages of Heartbreak


This post is contributed by One Drop member – Ranna Seah.

Three Stages of Heartbreak…and the oils to use…

Stage One
So painful, your heart felt squeezed.
So painful, you find it hard to breathe.
So painful, you can’t even cry.
Hang in there until you get some air…

Stage Two
You get angry, you get mad.
You blame everyone, especially yourself.
You think it could be better if only you had been prettier.
Hang in there and look in the mirror…its not you, not him, nor her…

Stage Three
Find it back, your princess rights.
Find it back, your glow and shine.
Find it back, your worth and passion.
Hang in there and have the world delivered to you on a platter…

Every Stage
Each stage breaks you a little and mends you a little.
Each stage chips you a little and builds you a little.
Every heart breaks a little differently…
And every heart mends a little differently…

Hang in there and know that the hearts…they do all heal eventually…

A little poem I wrote to go through what I felt about the three stages of a heartbreak. I’ve had my heart broken from a long distance relationship. He cheated on me and I don’t believe in love anymore. Self-love especially…as I came to realize.

Then I got into a relationship where I was treated lesser than he was. He controlled me by making me feel that I was never good enough. It got to the point that my Daddy God can’t stand it anymore and a suitor’s pursuit woke me. I realized how little I was playing and how much rights as a princess of God, I had given up.

Then I found my husband but I always thought that I picked him with my head (logic and rational) that I thought there was no love between us. And I always felt unworthy of his love and that probably as soon as he realise how lousy I was, he will pack and leave. It is my secret fear but one fear that I can face. But 15 years later, we are still together. And I realised that how I felt for him was the same 15 years ago. If this is not love, then I have no idea what it is. As I consciously put thoughts into my marriage and my husband, I realised what a fool I was for ‘looking at a gift horse in the mouth’. I was just missing it when it was all there right in front of me. And also a recent Reiki healing session made me realised that I had let go and moved on with a lot of things but I didn’t realize it. So perhaps…you had too…

Emotion is the one thing that the pharmaceutical cannot do what aromatherapy can do for you. Here are what I’ve put together oil recommendations to help you cope pass the Three Stages of heartbreak:

In Stage One
Freshly broken, so painful you cannot breathe easily

Oils: Any of the respiratory guys (Breathe Again, RC, Raven, Eucalyptus, Cypress, Pine, Spruce), PanAway (can take emotional pain away too), AromaLife (keep the heart going)

How to use: Apply over heart, chest and side of neck (vagus nerve), inhale deeply from palm.

In Stage Two
Rebuilding your self-worth, reprioritising your life

Oils: Stress Away and Valor

How to use: Stress Away on wrist, side of neck (vagus nerve), Valor over the heart and over the solar plexus (which holds your self-esteem). Inhale the oils from palm after applying. And if you can bring yourself to it, start encouraging and praising yourself. Or find your that one friend who always make you more worthy when you are in his/her company. “I know you can do it.”

*Diffuse any of the citrus oils for clarity of thoughts and uplifting of mood.

In Stage Three

Self-love and self-care, back to your passion

Oils: Bergamot and Ylang Ylang

How to use: Diffuse Bergamot, Ylang Ylang on wrist, heart, side of neck (vagus nerve), inhale from palm after applying

*Go for the Feelings Kit or oils like Forgiveness, Release, Gratitude and Present Time if you are ready and needed deeper emotional works. The strategy here is to get back to loving yourself. Talk to yourself in the mirror. Say “I love you” to yourself in the mirror. And mean it when you say it. “You are the prettiest princess in the whole wide world.”

Additional Tips: 

  1. You may oil as many times as you want to throughout the day for all three stages. I will recommend carrying the oil of your choice in smaller, travelling size if you need to.
  2. Be gentle with yourself and take as long as you need. You do not need to rush yourself. Only when you are ready.
And if…only if…you are ready. You are ready to move on…you are excited to move on! Reach for your ABUNDANCE! Abundance is the oil affectionately nicknamed as the “Law of Attraction” oil. A famous Hong Kong blogger used Abundance and the principles from ‘Law of Attraction’ to manifest her dream partner! Read on if you want to know how…but before you start your manifesting plans for a new relationship, do clear out your self-doubts and abundance block….forgiving yourself and your ex-boyfriend etc…

To manifest love or your dream partner with the Law of Attraction, you need to follow the 3-step manifesting process:

  1. Get clear on what you want (Be specific. What do you want? Why do you want it? What feelings do you want in this relationship? The more specific, the better!)
  2. Get ready for your new partner (Expect and believe and get ready to receive. Start to make room in your life for your new partner.)
  3. Once you are ready for the next step, start to wear Abundance essential oil. Dab a bit between your eyebrows, wear it on your wrist or in your hair so you carry the frequency. If your skin reacted a bit to Abundance (which is quite a hot oil with clove and cinnamon bark, do dilute with some carrier oil before applying, or just stay calm and drink more warm water for it shall pass. If you have compromised skin, don’t put it on your skin direct without diluting or simply just diffuse the oil)
  4. Take action! (Date, meet new people and enjoy!)
(To read more details about Manifesting Love, do visit where you can see photos from the author’s vision board and the partner she manifested! Amazing.)

Last note: 

Reminder to love yourself.

Self-love is very very important when it comes to manifesting love. And when you are filled with love, starting from within…you will be so filled and so lovable that you will start attracting the right people and opportunities in your life. 

I wish you all the best in your journey and please know that you are getting better each and everyday…

If you like my articles and would like to purchase the Young Living oils or have further clarifications, please drop me a message here or get in touch with my IG or Facebook. If you are ready to sign up as member to purchase, you can click here. I would love to support you in using the oils for yourself and your loved ones.


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